My brothers keeper
by Caban University
Summary: He's not dead, he set me up and while everyone is worrying about me, you find the evidence. He killed my brother because my brother was an easy target . Because I was my brothers keeper and I will find him even if it's the last thing I do.
1. Chapter 1

**I made changes to the story! Review! Subscribe! **

**ALSO, the format (how Misaki's talking) might be a little confusing. But I'm not going to explain it to you. I'm going to hope through my writing you'll understand what's happening. If you don't- PM me.**

* * *

><p>Nice to meet you, Winchesters...<p>

Yes, I'm 20 years old.

Yes I do. I'm here because the police suspects I killed Furiyhiko Usami a year ago.

No, I was set up. Mr. Winchester-san.

I know you don't believe me, no one does. But I'm telling you I did **not** kill him.

Because I was shot in the fucking throat, that's why I can't talk.

...No, I'm not serious. It was a surgery operation that went wrong.

I don't seem like a killer? How do killers seem? Usually they deny they ever did it...I'm not exactly helping my case am I?

I've never killed anyone in my life. I've never even had malicious intent to harm someone...well...Keichi doesn't count.

I was his keeper.

-_- yes I slept with people for money.

Well I stopped because of my brother, he got real sick and I…he made me promise to never sleep with anyone for money again.

Ahaha, yes. And stripping was off limits too.

Of course I stripped! I needed the money…

Oh I'm sorry…here's the story I guess…I hope you believe me by the end of this story…**detective**.

* * *

><p><strong>My brothers keeper<strong>

I was born on Christmas like my twin…but I guess that's not really important now is it?

Let's see… I had two brothers, one was on the verge of death because of his leukemia and my other brother, my twin, is crippled because of the car accident my parents got into when I was 8. Oh don't worry everyone lived, but my parents refused to take care of Hiroki since he was handicapped. I told them to shove off then I ran away with both my brothers. I would've stayed but it was quite obvious that they didn't want us.

Well because they hit us, mostly Takahiro because back then before he was sick he'd take care of us. It wasn't really beatings for Takahiro because he was their favorite child; it was something to hurt my twin and I with. Of course Takahiro wasn't home all the time, he did have friends you know? So when Takahiro wasn't home they would try to torture Hiroki, insults and hits. I can't tell you the number of times they tried to brand my Hiroki. I never let them…they never really did like that. I guess that's why I have so many bruises and cigarette burns. I just loved my brother too much to let him go through that.

At first, I didn't go to school because the orphanage I lived at can't afford everyone's education and because with my job you didn't need school. But I made a promise with my friend Paulie I'd go back, so I got Hiroki and Usagi to tutor me and they did. I got my G.E.D and I went to T University for economics. I was doing well for myself after the death of my brother. I stopped doing drugs…and I got Yoh and Aikawa to stop doing illegal stuff too.

Anyway, I worked as an escort back then although my main job was stripping. That's where I made most my money.

I know, I know, It's not the club's fault though…Pauli thought I was 21 and…and I needed the money. I needed it bad. You know, if it wasn't for the cash I sent every week (secretly of course) then the orphanage would've been shut down and we would've have had to live somewhere else. I was tired of moving around. Plus, the orphanage was better than Miyagi's house. Miyagi would come home at 3 in the morning high out of his mind. It was tough trying to explain his behavior to my brothers…trying to make excuses for my friend. But they believed me. They always did.

Back then…why I did all the things I did…understand that it was all for Takahiro. I couldn't leave, not without my brothers. They relied on me and even though I'm the youngest I have to protect both of them. No matter the cost. We wouldn't survive on our own. Not until I had gotten enough money saved up.

Please stop looking at me like that, you're scaring me.

I guess not. I've seen scarier stuff.

Hm? Oh the money? I planned to use the money to put both my brothers in college. Especially Hiroki. He was always reading books. He's smart unlike me…he could've amounted to something…well actually he's an intern at the college I went to. He's teaching literature.

Oh, I already had 5 grand saved up already.

I didn't leave, Mr. Winchester, because I was being selfish. I wanted to stay there with my family…my boyfriend. I should've just never went there, I know. I'm sorry.

I am.

Anyway, I was sitting on the ugly orange couch that the nun Lenalee had bought. It was 5 minuets until my 'job' started and I was extremely starving because hadn't eaten in the past 3 days due to the fact that Hiroki was a glutton (we didn't have enough food so I gave him mine) and Takahiro refused to eat anything on his plate (because he hated mashed potatoes) so I had to force my food (TV dinner) down his throat. I couldn't eat his mashed potatoes because I was allergic…but he didn't know that. No one did.

Potatoes were cheap so that's why we kept buying them…in case you were wondering…okay, sorry. Back to the story.

SO I was left waiting for my friend Aikawa to pick me up and take me to where my client was. I just hoped I didn't have to go to another party.

"Misaki! Takahiro won't take his medicine again!" Akihiko screamed from upstairs.

Akihiko Usami was a year older than me and his brother, Haruhiko Usami, was 2 years older than me. Akihiko, or as I call him Usagi, was in love with my brother Takahiro until he suddenly confessed his love to me. Happily I agreed to date him (he even knows that I'm involved in some illegal business) but his brother confessed to me a day after Akihiko did. I'm pretty sure both brothers are fighting for me, which is silly because I think brothers shouldn't fight. Not for anything in the whole wide world. Akihiko and me had been dating for at least 2 years. We started dating when I was 14…I think I was just turning 16 at that time.

With a sigh I walked up the stairs and almost cried right there when I saw my brother. He looked pale and he had dark rings under his eyes. He coughed twice and then smiled brightly. I took a deep breath and looked around the room. Everyone was there, Hiroki and his boyfriend Nowaki. Haruhiko and Akihiko were also there. I think they knew how hard this was for me so every time I visited Takahiro one of them came with me.

"Misaki!" Takahiro said making sounds like a toddler was. I swear he acted like he was 5 sometimes.

I sighed. "Takahiro…why are you giving Usagi a hard time about taking your medicine?"

Takahiro made a face. "Because needles are yucky!"

"It'll help you get better Taka." I motioned Akihiko to give me the needle. "You want to get better right?"

Takahiro pouted. "No way! Not if I have to take that nasty thing!"

I rubbed my head in anger. The doorbell rang and loud banging could be heard from downstairs. Lenalee opened the door and the person burst in screaming, 'OI! HURRY UP! BOSS IS MAD AS ALL HOLY HELL!"

I shivered. Miyagi Yoh.

He should come up in you're files. He's a very powerful man.

He has no boss…at least, not now anyway.

No, he would never set me up. I trust Yoh with my life.

You wouldn't. Even if you tried to put any of the people I mention today in jail it wouldn't hold up in court.

Well that's an easy question. It wouldn't hold up in court because who believes me?

Exactly.

Now, he was 5 years older than me and he was terrifying. Especially when he was upset…and apparently he was upset at me for some reason. I screamed at Aikawa to get out and that I'll be there in a minuet. That girl never did listen to anyone. She was like the devil, she really was.

"Look Taka, your 17. Can you please act your own age and take the needle willingly."

Takahiro looked guilty for a minuet. However he quickly recuperated and shook his head.

"I swear! I'm 15 and I act like the adult sometimes. Just take the damn medicine Takahiro…I need to be somewhere right now."

It was obvious I was scared out of my mind right now. Everyone noticed it. Nowaki sighed and put his hand on Takahiro's shoulder.

"Misaki has to go now. Takahiro you don't want to burden your younger brother do you?"

Hiroki sweat dropped. Damn Nowaki was manipulative.

"No…but I don't want to take the medicine! It hurts." Takahiro wailed. I sighed. Oh to hell with this.

"Remember that time you took me and Hiroki on your bike and we saw the ocean. Right before mama and papa died? Before you got sick?" I asked him. He nodded eagerly. Without him noticing I felt for a vein and slipped the needle into his skin.

"I packed some lunches for us because Oki forgot and we saw the sun rise, right there on the beach. We promised we'd always be brothers forever? That no matter what happens we'll all love each other forever?"

"Yes…" Takahiro's eyes closed, due to him not going to sleep on time and staying up with Akihiko telling stories.

"And then an ant crawled on Hiroki and he screamed his head off," Hiroki blushed and scoffed while muttering no I didn't, "You said, 'be brave man! Big brother will protect you! Well now I'll protect you Takahiro. I'll be big brother okay? So go to sleep and when I come back all of us will watch a movie."

"Mkay…I love you Misa." Takahiro muttered. I took the needle out of his vein and kissed his forehead lightly.

"I love you too Taka. Sweet dreams." I smiled when I heard the deep breathes that Takahiro was emitting. It showed he was alive.

I turned to Akihiko angrily. "Next time you big idiot, don't read him stories in the middle of the night."

Akihiko muttered sorry and I turned around but a wave of dizziness hit me and I fell into the side of the wall.

"Misaki! You okay?" Hiroki asked. Hiroki noticed the bones sticking from my shirt.

Because he gasped, rolled over to me, and poked my shirt.

Obviously, that's how I realized he saw my bones through my shirt.

The spot he poked happened to be a bruise where my last client had decided to squeeze and I flinched.

"Let me see your chest Misaki." Hiroki said hardly.

"No." I said. I turned around and kissed him on the forehead too although his expression was nowhere as cute as Takahiro's it was till cute. "I'll see you later."

"Wait! Misaki let me see you're chest." Hiroki shouted a little louder this time. Now my boyfriend and his boyfriend were looking at me curiously.

"Shut up Hiroki. Oh, Usagi there's food in the fridge for you just ask Lady Lena to warm it up for you. I had to make it since the cook quit, there's 5 dollars for all of you under your pillow to last you the next 2 days in lunch money."

"Misakiii," Hiroki wined, "Show me your chest now!"

I ignored him. "There's lunch for the rest of you guys in the fridge too but that's separate from Akihiko and Haruhiko's because they're allergic to jelly. Um…oh Takahiro's medicine is on the table give it to him at 5," I looked at my watch, "I should be back by then since that's only 2 hours from now but I'm not sure. Stay out of trouble okay? Especially you Usagi…"

I turned to leave but stopped remembering that I didn't tell Usagi about the new rule Lady Lena had come up with.

"Oh and Usagi, Lenalee said from now on there's no smoking the bathroom. Um, I think that's it…oh no. Nowaki! You needed how much for that trip?"

"Huh? Oh it's okay I have a job Misaki. It's only two hundred dollars and I have one hundred but the teacher said I could pay late if I had too. It's fine really." Nowaki purposely didn't mention that he had to pay one hundred dollars for a medical textbook he needed. I gushed. My Nowaki was so smart! He was the youngest in his class and he was the top of the class. He went to a specialized school for training doctors, the cost was around 2,000 dollars but with some overtime (and lots of bruises later) I managed to cover it. It would've been 5,000 dollars but Nowaki's so smart that he got a scholarship.

I dug in my pocket and (almost) pulled out a condom. Thank god I knew what it felt like and I quickly let go of it. I pulled out a wad of cash and counted out two hundred dollars. It was all my money. Sigh, I was going to get myself some food…like food at a restaurant. But that was hardly as important as Nowaki's education. My stomach rumbled lightly, I thought it was telling me 'No Misaki! Feed me!'

"Mhm, you use that hundred for that text book okay?" I said. When Nowaki refused to take it I crossed over Hiroki and stuffed it into his back pocket.

"Okay that's it. I have my cell if you need me, you know the emergency number-"

"We go through this every time you leave Misaki. We know how to dial 911." Haruhiko rolled his eyes. The last time I forgot to tell them that 911 was the emergency number the orphanage almost burnt down (Akihiko tried to cook).

"I hope so Haru. I really do…okay well I got to go!" I kissed Akihiko gently on the lips. He grabbed me and bit my ear.

"I haven't had Misaki in a long time…."

I blushed and pushed Akihiko away. "IDIOT PEVERTED USAGI!"

I ran down the stairs, opening the doors I flung myself outside and basically threw myself into the white punch buggie.

"Mmm, that was long Takashi." Miyagi purred from the front seat. My back straightened with fear.

"I had to give my brother his medicine…sorry." I added a 'sir' at the end in hopes that Miyagi wouldn't punish me.

Oh no, Miyagi was afraid of me…he wouldn't hurt me ever. Plus, he was my best friend.

I meant he'd punish me with tickling…stop laughing…it isn't funny.

"Geez, Misaki. You act like I force you to be my concubine." I deadpanned.

"You bruise my body everyday! Do you know the amount of coating I have to put on to cover it! Terrifying…you're absolutely terrifying."

"Aw! You love me though." He gave me a kissy face and I rolled my eyes.

The reason I was so terrified of my boss was because he came on to me almost every second. I could take the old perverted weird guys having their way with my body but I can't take them creepily smiling at me (Miyagi) from across the room.

Sigh...yes he was dating...no he **is** dating Shinobu.

Look dude, let me tell the story.

"Okay…so who's this client now? I head he's paying the big bucks for Aikawa but she refused because he's a weirdo that looks like her father" Miyagi laughed.

"Aikawa what have you been telling this child?" Miyagi laughed some more.

She mumbled something but didn't dare repeat what she said when Miyagi further questioned her about it. It was kind of a given that if you disrespected Miyagi you might as well kiss your paycheck and your life goodbye. I was the exception. I was always the exception.

Miyagi and I are very close friends; he was the one that gave my brothers' shelter and me for a few months. Just until we could get on our feet again, or at least go to some kind of orphanage. At least at the orphanage they're liable for medical assistance. I smiled to myself.

"He does look like my pops! Sheesh, you don't gotta be such a hard ass Yoh." Miyagi stiffened and Aikawa recoiled in fear. Oh boy, not again.

"SO! About this client…"

Miyagi snapped out of his evil thoughts and Aikawa gave a sigh of relief. "Well, Mr. Takahashi said he wanted the best of the best to act like his son being that his real sons are illegitimate and rebellious. He disowned them you know?"

I simply nodded.

"It's a damn drag that he didn't want the GREAT AWESOME AIKAWA! Seriously though he said the best, don't know why you didn't pick me."

I sweat dropped. "Um maybe because he needed a guy to play the son?"

"Exactly and plus…he asked for the BEST. You're the devil in the flesh Aikawa. Anyway Misaki! He wants you to act like the proper gentlemen…and then relieve his stress afterword…"

"That was not cool Yoh." Aikawa teased Miyagi. For a girl that was terrified of Miyagi she sure did like to push his buttons.

"How many times do I have to tell you, don't call me Yoh! Miyagi screamed.

"As long as Misaki's my friend you won't do anything to me…**Yoh**" She laughed manically. I felt kind of offended you know.

"I really want to fucking scrape your skin off your body…actually stop the car so I-"

"YOH!" He looked at me annoyed, "Leave her alone."

With a huff he turned around and pouted

The car ride was awkward with a silent silence. I don't even think anyone breathed even…that's how tense the air was.

"You know, I'm lucky I'm the best in the assassin job because I'm pretty sure Yoh would've re-hired me by now."

_No. He would've murdered you._ I giggled at my thought.

"Nope. I'm pretty sure Misaki is the better assassin."

Aikawa wined, "But he doesn't even kill anyone!"

"Did you shoot a gun? I feared for my life for a moment." Miyagi shuddered.

…I'm good with a gun because my father used to force me to hold one. He'd make me shoot animals in the back yard…he'd hit me if I didn't hit it on the first shot.

Obviously I practiced hitting targets and sooner or later every shot I'd ever fired was on point.

I chuckled a little. Even though I was burning with hunger and exhaustion I still kept going at my jobs. I had too, all for _my_ family. At least they wouldn't have to do any of this to survive…at least Takahiro wouldn't.

Aikawa groaned. "I'm still young! I should have the libido of a 16 year old too! Curse old age. Listen kid," She turned to me, "Your all energetic now, and that's okay I mean after all your only 21 but once you hit 30 you wont be feeling like you did 5 years ago. You feel me?"

"Um I'm sorry that no you told you." I looked at her with a sincere expression. Apparently Miyagi didn't know my true age because he looked at me with a confused expression too. It was funny really. It was.

"What?" Aikawa was interested now. She didn't take her eyes of the road (because she couldn't) but she defiantly wanted too.

"Um I'm not a 21 year old guy you know?" I thought you knew." I apologized profusely. Maybe now both of the adults would stop my work. I wouldn't allow that…I couldn't afford to.

"Eh? Well then your younger! Ahh I wish I was your age. On the verge of adult hood. 18 is a good number Misaki. Very good indeed." She smiled contently to herself.

"That's still a little-"

"No." Miyagi looked at me. I could tell he was peeved that I rudely cut him off. "I'm 15."

Aikawa stepped on the brakes and I collided with the front seat.

"WHAT?" They simultaneously shouted. Miyagi and Aikawa stared at me not caring that we were going to be late or that there were cars honking behind us.

"I thought you knew. That's why I never drink at parties…well that and when I usually get drunk I turn into a completely different person."

"Whoa…fifteen. Jesus kid." Miyagi rumpled his hair. "Why would you even want to live like this? Go back to your parents or something."

"Eh? You don't know?"

"Know-" Miyagi's phone began playing a song.

_I want you take over control _

_Take over control_

_T-T-Take over control _

_I want you to take over control_

_Take over control_

_Plug it in and turn me on_

Aikawa and me laughed while Miyagi mumbled, 'idiots'. He picked up the phone in a cheery expression.

"Shinobu! Hey, how's it going?"

Instantly I stopped laughing. Aikawa noticed and patted my leg (or at least tried to) "I know, Yoh's being all lovey-dovey with his new 20 year-old painter."

I sighed in relief. It was a different Shinobu.

"Hm? No just about to go to a party. You're coming back today right?"

I sighed and closed my eyes.

"Oh, okay." Miyagi sounded hurt, he instantly cheered up though, "Really? Should I go to the air port now?"

What if…What if it **was** my Shinobu, the one who'd I raised ever since I came to the orphanage, which was about 3 years ago. I was just over thinking thins, I thought to myself.

Shinobu? Why, he's not involved with this.

He **is** dating Yoh but I don't-

Shinobu _, age 22. He's been with his lover Miyagi Yoh for about 6 years.

He isn't.

Because if **my **Shinobu was involved with the drug smuggling that Miyagi quit from I would hurt him very badly.

Oh yes, back to the story.

"Okay I won't. All right, See you soon…okay bye…I love you too Shino. Bye."

Miyagi hung up the phone.

"Hey Yoh, Does Shinobu have blue hair and a scar near his right eye?" Just to confirm my unease, which was the only reason I asked.

"Eh? How do you know Shinobu? I haven't seen him since he told me he had his art collection being sold in London, anyway what does-"

"God dammit! That son of a bitch!" I kicked the back of the seat.

Yes, I did curse. I also did coke, drank patron, and fucked guys for a living so I'm sorry if a little cursing offended you.

…I'm sorry Mr. Winchester-san.

Okay then…I'm sorry Mr. Sam for insulting you're beliefs somehow…but there will be a lot of cursing.

Oh…lol, funny joke ^.^ Seriously though, can you please stop interrupting my train of thought…thank you…

"What the hell kid?" Aikawa said pissed that I was 'destroying' her precious baby car.

"How old do you think Shinobu is?"

"Um duh 20, I'm not a pedophile you know."" I clenched my fists in anger.

"He's 16 Miyagi. You've been fucking my 16 year old son you bastard." I bit my lip to stop myself from screaming. I was very, _very_ protective over the kids at the orphanage. I still am. Most of them are adults now…but they still view me as their parent because I loved for them and cared for them. It's still a little embarrassing to call someone older than you your son.

"WHAT?" Miyagi screamed. Then he turned to Aikawa and screamed, "DRIVE BEFORE WE'RE LATE!"

She stepped on the gas and I went lurching forward again.

"We will deal with this issue when I get home. And as for my parents, they're both dead. What you have been picking me up for the past year is an orphanage."

No my parent's were very much alive.

I was trying to explain that Mr. Sam.

No it's okay. I understand you want answers now…I understand you're trying to help me. It's okay.

It was silent. I was still of course furious with Miyagi AND Shinobu. Not only was I furious I felt betrayed, how could my little Shino lie to me and tell me that he had met no one special. That he was still single.

"I'm sorry…but I'm not giving him up."

I grated my teeth. "Like hell you are."

It was quite obvious that I didn't want to talk about it but of course, as usual, Miyagi decided to push my buttons.

"I love him." Miyagi blushed at the statement like blushing was supposed to make it feel better.

"Miyagi, I swear if you don't shut up right this second."

Aikawa looked at me surprised but turned around when I pointed at the road. Miyagi looked at me with an evil glare also. I suppose he thought I overstepped my boundaries…but I don't care. The boys at the orphanage were **my **life.

"Listen kid-" He was cut off by my punch. I mean, I didn't punch him but it came quiet close.

Well, I think it came close.

"Listen **Yoh**, those kids are my responsibility do you understand? So if one of them gets hurt I'm going to be a very pissed person. Get it?"

"Huh?" I swear my boss is an idiot sometimes.

"If you hurt Shinobu I will end you. I will not stop until your crying on the sidewalk wishing for your death. Do. You. Understand?" I glared heatedly at him while he gapes his mouth like a fish.

"Y-Yea…" I leaned back and smiled while Aikawa whispered 'whipped'. I laughed when Miyagi pulled his gun on her; we both knew he wasn't going to shoot which made it funnier.

* * *

><p>Yea…we had a type of dry humor when it was just the three of us.<p>

Hm? Oh they're my friends. Aikawa and Yoh are wonderful people…if it's possible…please don't hurt them. For everything they've done…and they've done a lot, please don't get them in trouble.

Thank you, Mr. Winchester.

Er...okay Sam...and you? Mr...

Okay. Hi Dean..Oh I'm sorry I totally forgot. My name is Misaki Takahashi.

Oh please, just call me Misaki.

Yea…I will…it's just…well, can you tell me how Akihiko is doing?

Still?

Can you just make sure he doesn't…you know…

Thank you.


	2. Chapter 2

THANK YOU TO MY REVIEWERS:

_LunaRise_: Thank youuuu! I never expected someone to say my fics don't fail & yea, I always see Misaki as a supporter type. I feel bad for him kinda in this fic. Anyway, I hope this unconfused you? Misaki isn't Miyagi's substitute. Since Miyagi is playful in the anime I just made him playful in this fic too. He's an old flirt. And thank you for telling me his last name was wrong. Whoopsies on my part.

_TeaBags: _Yea, I watched the movie and I bawled my eyes out…then I wondered, what would Misaki do. Add a few rapes (I'm one sick puppy) and angst moments and you get my type of thing. I'm trying not to make it exactly like the film but Misaki will be helping his brother out of….whoops…can't say…but Misaki will save Takahiro's life, however, what is the cost of saving his brother's life? Losing his sanity? Or dying? Annnd this just turned into a summary. Hehe, mkay!

cookie17: THANK YOU! I hope you like angst though because this story is a whole lot.

AND TO MY SUBSCRIBERS! LunaRise, IchiAi, PrincessFuFU, lynx44, Brookie cookie17

AND TO MY FAVORITERS! PrincessFuFU, IchiAi

* * *

><p><strong>My brothers keeper<strong>

We arrived at a big mansion. I opened the door to get out only to have some weirdo (Sumi) close it on me. I growled angrily. I was not in the mood for his shit right now.

"Here," Miyagi handed me a box labeled Gino's suits. He shrugged sheepishly, "It's the best I could do for you. I know you said you had money troubles and you can't exactly look like that when you go."

My eyes watered. "Thank you."

He handed me another box that was labeled Victoria secrets. What the fuck? "Um, Miyagi what the hell is this?"

"That's for the pleasuring part of your job." Miyagi chuckled when I threw the box back at him. He scooped the box up and shoved it into my chest.

"You have to wear it! He bought it specifically for whoever was going to be with him! He's your father Misaki. Listen to your father."

I rolled my eyes. "Oh nice. I get to have oodles and boodles of yummy bondage time with my 'father'."

Miyagi laughed his heart out while I got changed in the back. Putting the lingerie under the suit I stepped out looking all intelligent and spiffy.

"He's not that old you know!" Miyagi was offended since the male was only 6 years older than he was.

"Okay. Tell that to me when he asks for whips and chains because he can't get it up and he likes S&M."

Miyagi shook his head and mumbled a, 'what are kids learning these days?'

"Remember, this time don't seduce every male you see okay?" Miyagi sighed and then muttered to him, "You don't need anymore clients."

"Number one, we both know that's a lie. Number two; I'll only seduce the gay single ones okay? And number three, you know how I love yummy incest sex so get off my back grandpa."

Sumi laughed behind me, "He said 'YO MOMMA AINT GOT NO NIPPLES!'

"Shut the hell up you stalker." Miyagi said and rolled his eyes when Sumi faked a stab in the heart.

"Why are all of you coming anyway?" I asked.

"Assassin!" Aikawa said.

"Look out!" Sumi said.

"Cleaner…" Miyagi grumbled. I felt bad for Miyagi, cleaner meant you had to risk your identity because you talked with the cops. Not a good job but necessary plus Miyagi always found the sleaziest cop and offered one of his clients services. It works every time I swear it does…No I won't tell you that. Do you think I'm a snitch? I'm just saying that cops are pretty sleezy sometimes. Occassionaly you got the good cops that help you…stop smiling, you're not one of them. ANYWAY, like I was writing:

I smiled.

You know, it was funny how I was smiling too because at that time I wanted to die. I would've done it too but I didn't want everyone looking at me all sad and sympathetic. Especially Hiroki and Takahiro, they'd just die looking at me all bloody and dead. Back then, I couldn't stand my brothers crying. Nope, not for anything in the world.

I walked into the elegant mansion only to be greeted by, no not the person who was my 'father', but his secret mistress. How did I know that she was his mistress? Well because number one she kept fixing her shirt, she smelled of musk and dove, and I have a keen sense on these things.

Anyway, she led me to these group of people mind you she was glaring at me the whole way. It was quiet besides the hundreds of people laughing in that condescending tone. I tell you; some times I really do hate people. Not any type, I'm not racists or nothing I just hate people.

She placed her hand on a mans back as the woman across from her glared heatedly. I smiled to myself; I think I just found the wife. My smile soon dropped when I realized just who this woman is. I began to sweat in fear.

"Oh hello, my name is...Misaki?" The older man asked. When I nodded the two adults, now hand and hand, looked me up and down disgustingly. I hate when people do that. It's phony. The world is full of a bunch of morons, crazies, and phonies.

I cleared my throat. "Hello father. I'm sorry I was late to this occasion I had some work to tend to. I hope I haven't disappointed you father."

My father looked surprised for a moment but he quickly understood why I was here. It made me sick to my stomach, I'm not kidding. I almost felt like throwing up but I didn't. I wouldn't get paid if I did.

"Ah, Mr. Usami, It's a pleasure to introduce my child. He pushed me toward a man with brown hair that resembled Akihiko and Haruhiko.

I grabbed his hand firmly and shook it. He was impressed with my grip. I could tell by his eyes. "I'm honored to meet you, my name is Shi."

Shi is my business name.

Of course I wouldn't tell these phychos what my name really was…they would try to follow me. I learnt that the hard way when Sumi (still stalking me) found me and showed up the next day at the orphanage. He burst through the door and started wailing MISAKI! MISAKI MY DEAR! Over and over again. I had to deal with a drunk Sumi who was convinced we were married and a very infuriated jealous Usagi, AND it was my birthday. My freaking 15th birthday and I had to deal with this bullshit.

The gruff dark voice of Mr. Usami cut through my stream of conciseness. "I hear you'll be succeeding your fathers warehouse in London?"

My dad bit his lip...he was worried. He always bit his lip when he was worried.

"No not yet. I want to fully prepare for the job before my father hands it to me. I don't want to let him down." I smiled at him and he smirked. I wanted to punch him in the face. I wanted to stab his eyes out then kick him while he was screaming on the ground. Then I'd drag him outside cut him up into little ittie bits and pieces and throw him in the nearest dumpster because that was what he was. Trash.

"You did a good job in raising your son Takashi." The man looked down in a sad note. His wife grabbed his hand and immediately said, "I'm almost ashamed that I abandoned my children. They were just so…needy."

I gritted my teeth. _That's because they're children you ass hole. _

"No. No it's okay. I had to abandon my other three children because one was paralyzed, one was gay and the other one whored himself around."

I shook my head in shame trying to pretend like he wasn't talking about my brothers and I. Out of the corner of my eye I noticed Mr. Usami flinch when his wife talked about their sounds. He bit his lip, his eyes watered and he squeezed his hands into fists. No one else noticed, only I did. Even as a kid I noticed the little things a person did no matter how stupid they were.

"I'm very…appalled that my siblings wouldn't appreciate my father. He's a great man, he's very responsible of course and he is strict and hard working as well as my mother. I'm honored to be their son, I really am."

Mrs. Usami was apparently impressed because she let out this weird 'huh' sound. Her face lit up like a Halloween lantern.

"It seems like your son has convinces me and my husband to become partner associates with you. I'll transfer 10 grand for the start…I hope you'll work our trust Mr. Takashi."

My dad looked excited. He ruffled my hair and I had to physically hurt myself to avoid him touching me. When he touched me I felt the cigarette burn my mother left a few years ago, right under my ear. I smiled and slyly rubbed my ear.

The rest of the party went on without a hitch. I schmoozed with some of my fathers clients and hit on the in the closet gay men. I have a gay-dar I swear to everything I do. Miyagi would be pissed knowing I've booked 25 more clients without revealing my true identity. He'd always be pissed for everything I did; I think he was a bit overprotective of me.

Anyway, the party went swell. Ugh I hate the word swell. Only phony people said swell. I'll admit sometimes I'm phony so I use it…but swell just grates my nerves. So the party went swell and soon we, my mother and father, climbed in their limo.

The silence was besetting and it was getting on my nerves.

"You're doing the job with your brother?" My mother hurled at me in disgust.

"I made him quit doing that stuff. Told him it was unbecoming of a man." My father chuckled; apparently he saw the irony in it too.

"So you do it?" He asked.

"Yes. Takahiro has leukemia now so he can't take care of us and Hiroki is in a wheel chair. It's up to me. I do what I can and try harder at what I can't." For a second I thought I saw a glint of satisfaction in my father's eyes but it was gone as quick as it had came.

"Pathetic bunch you are." My mother spitted out. Her hair had turned gray and her wrinkles caved in her face to produce a never-ending scowl.

"Pathetic bitch you are." I smiled. She recoiled in shock by the harshness of my words. I think it was time that they realized that I was not in the mood for their behavior.

My father chuckled. "I see you've grown Misaki."

My mother interrupted me, "Mm, baby let's just drop him off here. We don't know what his kind of people charge. He could be charging us a fortune by just talking to him."

"You pay my boss upfront and he tells you the rules. You already paid for this so for another hour I'm yours to play with. If you want to watch while I boink some body, my rules during sex, which Henry should've told ya; Bondage is extra, and physical pain like smacking are extra depending on how much you hit me. You try to steal my shit and my boss'll murder ya. Kissing me on the lips is a big no-no. If I think your trying to go for my lips I will personally murder you. I got a license to do that ya now?"

My mother nodded her head like she understood why I didn't want anyone to have my kiss. I felt like that was the only thing I had left…oh! Which reminds me.

"OH yea! I don't blow and I don't take blows."

"That can change, quite quickly actually." He smiled wickedly. I gulped in fear, oh god please don't tell me he still wants to _do_ it. "Oh lookie we're here."

"What do you mean Henry?" My mother hesitated when she said my father's name. Perhaps she was too busy screwing other guys she forgot which one was her husband.

"I'm going to get my money's worth Loretta." The driver turned and stopped at an abandoned alley. He looked at me and grabbed my hand dragging me out of the limo.

"HENRY! That's still our son for Christ-sakes!" My mother looked very worried. I wondered why, she hated us right?

"And plus, I already told my boss to send you half the money back so I wont be having sex with you…_father."_

"Yes, but I already paid haven't I…I've always wanted to do this you know?" He looked at me and grabbed my wrist. I screamed hoping that Miyagi had finished his job and followed us like he always did. Unfortunately luck sucks and he hadn't followed us. He threw me out of the car and I stumbled on my knees. My father came behind me and I head the zippering sound of his pants. My face paled. No, oh no.

Behind the dumpster was where I gave my first blow, forcibly. I would've bit it off but he had his hand in my hair and he would've pulled. It was vile, disgusting, and gross. I don't know how I got through it actually. Then he pulled my face to his and kissed me. He kissed me hard and passionate and when he was done he let me drop on the floor. Then while I was crying he dragged my pants to my knees. You know what, I'm not even going to say what happened next. I was left naked and shivering in the rain. There was blood under me and all I could feel was mind haulting pain. He smiled and left, I cried as the car drove away.

* * *

><p>Why? Because my kisses were for Usagi! My mouth was for Usagi! Having that kiss was worse than when any guy used me for their sexual desire, it was worse than any from of rape…it was worse than death.<p>

I didn't kill him! I didn't kill him! I didn't want anyone to die!

I wanted someone to die? Of course I did!

I WANTED TO DIE!

I couldn't do it...because I was a wimp. If I did it...everyone would be happier.

Of course he'd be dead but like I said...everyone would've been happier.


	3. Chapter 3

Of course he found me. Miyagi found me.

Sometimes I do. I mean, wish he'd never of find me. That way, I could just dissapear into nothingness.

Oh no. That was just the beginning. He'll come in time. My father will appear in this story.

And him too. Of course Fuyuhiko was there. You must remember that ever since the day I saw him...he's always been there. Always been watching.

No...he wasn't watching for his sons. He'd have you think his wife was a heartless bitch, I mean she was, but he'd have you think that she was the only one capable of commiting crimes. Henious crimes.

Yes, I know Fuyuhiko was capable of being an evil man. I saw that. His sons saw that. Everyone did.

Why did everyone turn on me? Well, because it was easy. It was easier to blame me rather than blame someone who was loved by many.

I won't.

Because he was loved by me also. That child was my son in a way.

I will not tell you.

...you promise?

They are? The cameras are off?

Well...since my lawyer says you can't screw me on this one...

The person who killed Usami Fuyuhiko was Nowaki Kusama.

It wasn't his fault! He's a good boy! He was protecting the one he loved! It was self-defense for Christ sakes!

Because after that son of a bitch poisened my brother he went to Hiroki next.

Yes, Hiroki. It started off with strange letters, then it progessed to dead animals outside his door, and then Hiroki was almost hit by a car outside the university where he taught.

Because he told Nowaki...and me.

I saw it.

I saw everything.

I took the blame...

And no one knows. And we are going to keep it that way, okay?

Well, I decided to come clean because one, I didn't do it and two, I...I wanted Usagi-san to love me again.

Of course he said he believed me...but there was always that hint of doubt. That hint of anger. He hated me...I saw it. I...I wish I could tell him I loved him. I love him.

* * *

><p>When Miyagi came I was already crying. All I remember was screaming, "Take me home! Take me home! Take me home!"<p>

Next thing I knew, I was in front of the orphanage.

Do you know why I was so upset? I mean, you're probably asking yourself _Doesn't he always do this? _You see, my lips were reserved for the person I loved, they were reserved for the people at the orphanage when they needed a good night kiss, for Takahiro when he wouldn't go to sleep, for Hiroki when he became depressed, and especially for Usagi. My mouth was the only pure thing I could give to Usagi…and even that was gone now too. I sobbed harder.

"Misaki, what happened?" I didn't answer Miyagi.

How could I? I was pratcially gagging in the back seat. I needed someone to hold me. I needed my twin. He'd always make me feel better. I needed both my brothers.

We reached the orphanage and all the lights were out. It had been way past 5, it was approaching 10. Still I didn't care, I shoved the door open and screamed out in pain when I tried to walk. Miyahi came around the passanger side and carried me bridal style again. I was sobbing as he banged on the door and I carefully watched as the lights flickered on. The door was opened by Lenalee and Nowaki who was in the back holding a bat.

"W-where's Hiroki?" I barely managed to cry out. Nowaki looked at me surprised and pointed upstairs. The words were caught in the back of my throat and I couldn't talk. I wanted my brothers. I wanted them at that moment.

"Go get Shinobu too." Miyagi stepped in with Aikawa in tow. Nowaki disappeared and Lenalee stepped forward in an offensive stance.

"Shinobu has the chicken pox…what do you want him for anyway?" Lenalee said.

Miyagi scoffed and rubbed my hair. "Fuck if I care. Get his ass down here now."

Lenalee began to reprimand the man but I burst into more tears. I felt disgusted with himself.

Akihiko threw himself down the stairs practically and hugged me. I was switched from Miyagi's arms to Usagi's. I pushed him away.

Because it made me feel worse about myself you know? He cared about me so much, and what was I doing? Whoring myself to other men!

I cried harder that day, if that was possible, into Usagi's shirt. It was hours before I heard that crank of the maniene and the angry voice of my brother. I sobbed even louder, so loud that I woke the whole orphanage up.

Hiroki came rolling towards me and Usagi put me down. I fell on my brother and held onto his legs. "Sh Misaki, what's wrong?"

I was sniffling now. It felt like I couldn't breathe. Suddenly I was being embraced by Takahiro, who had half of the IV in his veins.

"Takahiro! Y-y-y-your not supposed t-t-t-o be-" I couldn't even finsish my sentace, now wasn't that sad?

"You must be kidding me if you think I'd stay there waiting to die while my baby brother is crying his heart out?" He said tiredly and sluggish. He looked horrible.

I let out a small wail but no sound was heard. I think I lost my voice with all the sobbing I'd been doing. For a while I just stood there and hugged both my brothers. I was still in hysterics when Shinobu came down sluggishly. He looked at me shocked and then looked at Miyagi and practicly fainted.

"Oh my god, I'm going to die." Shinobu said in his raspy voice.

"Oh yes. If my good friend Miyagi doesn't kill you first for lying to him, then I will." I said while Miyagi walked over to the boy. Pulling him by the ear Miyagi dragged Shinobu out of the orphanage and into the dark night. No one went after him because they figured if I approved of the man then they did too.

"Was that Miyagi?" Takahiro asked. I laughed awkwardly.

"I think it is…Hey, Misaki? How come we didn't just stay with him?." Hiroki asked me.

"You know why." And he did know why. **They** would've found us.

20 minuets later I'd finally calm down. Shinobu came in all red and puffy eyed and Miyagi came in with a red hand print on his face. I inwardly chuckled. "Misaki," Takahiro began however he coughed and nearly collapsed. I tried to tell someone to get him to his bed but, number one I couldn't talk, and number two Harhuhiko beat me to it.

"Someone get this idiot back in his bed," I glared at him, "And don't even leave him by himself. I'm going to reprimand him as soon as I get up there…fucking idiots the lot of you." Haruhiko muttered to himself. He stomped up the stairs and began his rant on Takahiro. Those two would be a perfect match for each other I tell you.

"Misaki…what happened?" Hiroki's innocent voice resided in my hear. I stiffened and replied, "Nothing."

"MISAKI! If you don't tell me then I'll snip your penis off…and if you don't show me your chest I'll snip your nipples off too." Hiroki said while smiling. That little boy is the devil, I swear he is.

"I…I saw…I saw **them,**" I couldn't say their proper titles, because they weren't my paren'ts anymore but that was enough to shock Hiroki into silence. He prodden on, "And?"

"I…He…Hiroki," I wailed and started rying into his pant leg again. He patted me on the head.

"M-Misaki…please tell me that's not what I think it is." Hiroki touched my neck to where the purple and blue bruise was. I couldn't speak so I just nodded my head. Suddenly Hiroki screamed; "TAKAHIRO!"

My brother came rushing down the steps, stumbling a bit at the last few. Haruhiko huffed and started grumbling. Takahiro fell to his knees and Haruhiko helped him up again.

"S-sorry haru-san, can you help me get to my brother?" Harhuko blushed when Takahiro grabbed him tighter. Through my sniffles I smiled. Anyway, Takahiro came over with the help of a grumpy elf (although haruhiko was tall) and he collapsed on the floor.

"What happened," Takahiro said very slowly and out of breath.

"Misaki saw mom and dad."

Takahiro stiffened. I wanted to disappear that second right there. It was too humiliating.

"Wait, you have parents?" Lenalee said confusingly. Takahiro nodded his head, we had told everyone that our parents had died in a car crash.

Why? Well it was easier than explaining that we ran away. Plus, the orphanage wouldn't take us in if we had…I asked before.

"They abandoned us." Hiroki covered for himself. I kept screaming in my head, 'I want to dissapear'

"W-w-w-we r-ran away," I said, my voice was shaky. I had calmed down now but I could feel those bastards lips on mine. I told Lady Lena the truth finally. It felt good.

Oh, because she's a lady so we call her Lady Lena. Sorry, it's a little cheesy but you know me, cheesy as can be.

Ah, yes. I'll go on then.

Please stop glaring at me like that Dean, you're creeping me out.

Anyway, Usagi had a hurt expression on his face when he said, "You lied?" and I felt like crying even more, but I didn't. Men don't…

Look, can you please stop interrupting me. I'm trying to tell you the god damn story and I can't if you keep asking me questions. I call him Usagi because I want to okay? Now shut the hell up and listen! Shit, you guys are lucky that I'm even writing this shit down for you.

OW! YOU ASS HOLE THAT HURT! Fine, fine. No need to get your panties in a bunch. I'll tell you the rest of the story, just shut up okay?

Anyway like I was saying, I felt like crying but men don't cry so I bit my lip to stop the tears.

"Usagi I-"

"You lied to us? Why?" Lenalee looked appalled. Takahiro coughed and tried to regain his breathing.

"Because it's none of your damn business." Hiroki spitted out. He could be really mean if he wanted too.

"Hiroki, be kind." I said. Takahiro tried to sit up but up but he failed, epically.

"Our Orphanage does NOT harbor run aways, do you understand Mr.?" Lenalee scolded. Hiroki was shaking in anger, I could feel his arms tighten around me. "And the reason why you would run away from your parent's, who love you and care for you, while these children are suffering is beyond me. I'm reporting you-"

All of a sudden Takahiro slammed his hands on the wooden floor. I had never seen my brother so upset

"Please, be quiet." I rolled my eyes. Even when he was upset he was always polite.

"Excuse me?" Lenalee looked offended. He hadn't meant to offend her…we just wanted to stay at our home.

"I said, please be quiet." Takahiro coughed, "You're upsetting my brother."

It was akward but I laughed anyway because I was the type of person to just laugh away my worries.

"I'll leave. Hiroki and Takahiro are going to stay here though. At least until I find a decent place, okay?" I said this time serious. Akihiko bolted up and grabbed me to my feet. He kissed me and I pushed him away. He didn't need to taste what I've tasted. Everyone was surprised by me pushing Akihiko away because I always welcomed his kisses.

"Where are you going to stay? You don't have a decent job!" Nowaki excalaimed trying to stop Hiroki from wheeling over the nun.

"I have a job and it pays as much as I want to charge."

Yes I know, If I wanted to keep my profession secret I wouldn've have said that. The thing is…I was so upset I didn't know what I was saying. You know?

"Wait..." Takahiro's face became all scary like and I flinched. He knew what I did, why I came home so late and why I always took a shower when I came home, "Misaki you're not doing what I think you are, are you?"

"What do you think I'm doing?" I said, trying to pretend I knew nothing of what he was talking about. Did I ever tell you I'm a terrible liar? Well I am, and he knew right off the bat that something is wrong.

"The job _I _had to take when we ran away. The job_ you _forced me to quit when I wasn't sick." Takahiro said. Hiroki gasped and started crying.

Yes, the big cold-hearted Hiroki began crying and then Takahiro started. Soon they were booth crying and their lovers (Haruhiko has something going on with Takahiro, I can tell) were soothing them while shooting me confusing glares.

"Misa…why? We don't need the money…we're good on the allowances that the orphanage gives us. We-" Takahiro was cut of from his

"Allowance?" I chuchled to myself, "The orphanage was going to be run down when I came here. In 2 days if they didn't get 20,000 dollars to the mayor then they'd demolish the place."

"H-How…then how did you get it?" Hiroki asked me. I turned away and prepared to tell them the truth.

It was silent. Real silent.

And I said, "Because I slept with the mayor."

"Misaki…why? We could've just-" Takahiro began coughing.

"And I slept with president's secretary." I said ignoring the tears down my boyfriends face, "And I fucked all the rich people you could name and they come back because they're dirty little shits and if that's not enough…if one of you gets sick or needs something for school," Nowaki and Takahiro cast their heads down. "Then I give head to anyone who wants it."

"Stop lying." Miyagi said quickly. I rolled my eyes.

"Mind your business Yoh."

"H-He gets to call you Yoh?" Shinobu sniffled.

"Oi! Brat stop crying!" Shinobu cried harder, "AHH! STOP CRYING BRAT!"

"Don't call him a brat!" Lenalee scolded Miyagi. My ehad was beginning to hurt from all the yelling.

"Wait…why were you lying Misaki?" Takahiro said softly. I bit my lip.

"Listen bitch, I'll call him whatever I want to call him okay?" Miyagi yelled.

"Don't call Lenalee a bitch, you idiot!" Hiroki yelled back at Miyagi.

"I'll call her whatever the fuck I want to call her!" Miyagi yelled.

"I'LL BREAK YOUR FACE! YOU FUCKING MORON!" Hiroki screamed. He lunged for Miyagi while Lenalee screamed, Haruhiko covered Takahiro's ears, and Akihiko went to wheel Hiroki away from Yoh.

Shinobu kicked Hiroki's wheel to prevent him from coming closer to Miyagi.

"Don't even think about touching him with your shitty hands."

"You have shitty hands, you freak." Hiroki yelled at Shinobu.

"Freak? You're in a fucking wheel chair!" Shinobu pointed at Hiroki.

"And you're cooking sucks! AND YOU'RE AN ORPHAN DUMB SHIT!"

The screaming continued and at some point Aikawa had Akihiko in a tight head lock screaming, 'You idiot author.'

Apparently she knew Akihiko because he was an author at her second job which was being a publicist.

Don't look at me like that, at the time I didn't even know Akihiko liked to write. The screaming picked up on volume since everyone in the house, even Takahiro, was screaming.

More screaming.

And more screaming.

And more- "EVERYONE SHUT THE FUCK UP!" I yelled.

At once there was silence. I smacked Shinobu on the head and then I smacked Hiroki, "Don't you dare ever curse again, understand me?"

"You're such a hypocrite! You just cursed!" Shinobu exclaimed.

"I'm going to hit you again for talking back, do you understand? Both of you are brothers. Both of you are family and if I ever hear you insult each other again I'll break both your fingers, under-fucking-stood?"

"I'm sorry Misaki, we understand." They both said simatanousley.

"How could you?" Akihiko stepped away from me. He had a look of betrayal.

"I do what I have to do." I said firmly. I refused to cry.

"Then…all those times we kissed...your lips were somewhere-" I cut him off;

"It meant nothing to me…we meant nothing to me." I said.

Of course I was lying! He meant the world to me.

I said it because I didn't want him to love me. It was disgusting loving me. Even after I supposedly killed his father he still told me he loved me.

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" Akihiko said.

I merly shrugged and I turned around.

"So what you're leaving us here? Leaving your own brothers?" Hiroki screamed at me.

Akihiko joined in on the screaming, "Where were you a few hours ago? Were you blowing every guy you could see you damn whore?"

I winced but kept my composer. I would not let Akihiko see through my lie.

"A few hours ago I was supposed to sleep with the guy who had requested I go to the party with him. That guy turned out to be my father. So I played along and then I told him I'd refund him his money. That I wouldn't do anything with him so he didn;'t have to worry but-" I began tearing up.

"Misaki, it's okay. We'll take care of him." Miyagi said. He squeezed my shoulder in support.

"He told me to get out the car…and I did…and then he forced me to get down on my knees and….I can't finish the rest but I imagine you can paint the picture."

"Oh Misa, I'm so sorry." Lenalee said. I ignored her however.

"That was the only time I've felt disgusted with what I was doing. What I've done for the family but it made me realize…I'm worthless."

Akihiko began to say something but I talked over him, "I'm worthless and now I know, I don't belong with a family. I'll still send you money and I'll still save up for each and everyone of your colleges even if you do get adopted. I'm leaving."

"MISAKI!" Takahiro screamed as I ran out of the house. Little did I know that Takahiro would faint, he'd be rushed to the hospital, and then they'd tell him that he had 2 more months to live…unless someone with the same blood type and bone structure as him agreed to a painful operation 2 times everyday for the rest of his life.

No…no the leukemia would've killed him eventually. But he didn't die of leukemia.

He died of Rat poisoning. It was mixed in with his drink and under all the chemo-

Ah, you're a smart man you are Dean. Yes, under all the radiation therapy the poisin extensified. Medical documents were forged and it was made to be a death from cancer.

I did it because I had to take care of him.

That's how I really became my brothers keeper.


	4. Chapter 4

I should have known that everything couldn't be right.

I should have known that my life **could** have gotten worse. The first person I'd called after I ran away was was Miyagi. He was...He still is my friend.

Thanks.

You don't have to be nice; I know I'm not kind. I used to be, but I'm not anymore.

...oh..well...I appreciate it. You're not so mean yourself.

* * *

><p>"Are you sure you don't want to go back?" Miyagi asked for the third time that day. He had driven me to Aikawa's house where it was agreed I'd spend the night.<p>

"I'm sure Yoh." Miyagi rolled his eyes, "If there's anymore work for me just let me know, okay?"

"Work? Misaki, with the state you're in I don't think you shoul-"

"Fuck off." I snatched the cigarette out of her hands and I placed it on my lips. I had a really bad smoking problem. And I had a really bad alchohol consumption problem. And I also had a really bad weed addiction problem. I just had a lot of problems.

Miyagi reached towards me to grab the cigarette from my mouth but I ran out of the car and took out my phone. I needed to release. I needed money now that I had to start looking for places. I could've rented out an apartment on 22nd street, but that was in a bad neighborhood and I wanted my brothers to have the best. Fucking Brooklyn sucked.

"Misaki get your ass over here and give me the cigareete." Miyagi demanded. I rolled my eyes and listened for Paulie's voice over the phone.

"Shut up, I'm on the phone."

Paulie was a body builder, he was tan with brown spiked hair and green eyes. He was also my manager at the strip joint. Paulie was a real nice man. He actually cared about me.

Anyway, a few minuets later I heard the usual, "_Hey! My little kitten, how's it going love?" _

"Hey Paulie. Listen, I'm in deep shit right now I was wondering…well…is it okay if I work tomorrow?"

Pause.

"_You know how I feel about you working, love." _

I sighed.

"ARE YOU TALKING TO PAULIE?" Miyagi screamed from the driver seat.

"IT'S NONE OF YOUR BUISNESS WHO I TALK TO YOU PEDOPHILE!" I screamed back at Miyagi who in turn gripped the steering wheel tighter.

Paulie laughed.

_"Really love. I don't want you working here." _

I gasped. He never denied me a job.

"What? You can't do this to me! I need the money, Paulie!"

_"Ugh, fine. I don't approve of this though. You're so young. You need to be in school or something…You're just a baby kitten, my love. 21 is a cherished number." _

"15, he's 15!" Miyagi was next to me listening to the conversation. I smacked him away from me.

"_No! Hablando porque luista." _

"Paule, you don't even speak spanish…you don't even understand what you just said…hell I don't understand what you just said." I was hoping he didn't hear Miyagi tell him my real age.

"_15? Fucking 15, Misaki? There's no working when you're 15! Go back to school!" _Paule screamed.

I was nearly on the verge of tears. "I have to take care of my family…I…please Paule, I'll do anything for this job. I need the money."

And I really did. You'd think that being an escort would make me money, but it doesn't. I only receive 10 percent of what I make. The rest goes to Miyagi's boss.

It's protection money. I pay him and the people I sleep with don't kill me. The reason I had gotten so much money to pay for school and everything is through my stripping job. I'm a high class stripper, 5,000 for just a peak of me. People liked me.

"…_Anything?" _

I gulped. I had thought Paule was different from everyone, I thought he was sweet and kind.

"Yes."

"_Then will you…go back to school? For me, kitten? Please?" _He pleaded.

I laughed. I thought he would've wanted sex or something.

"Yes, I will."

"_Then tomorrow come by at 4. There will be a lot of business for you then."_

"Thanks Paul."

"YOU'RE GIVING HIM THE JOB? HE'S 15 FOR GODSAKES! He lives in a-" I kicked Miyagi hard. Aikawa laughed.

"Shut the fuck up right now." I told him, "Sorry Paulie I have to go…and thank you."

"_Wait." _He was breathing hard over the phone, "_Misaki, I care about you. More than I should sometimes. If you ever need help with anything come to me. You're someone special…I-I love you."_

My heart stopped beating. Miyagi also gasped and went to snatch the phone away from me.

"Paule I…I have someone I love and I-"

I heard him shriek from the other line, "_Oh my god! I'm sorry, I'm totally not coming onto you! Eeps! I meant I love you like a son! You're like my son! That's just…sorry kitten." _

"You call you're sons kittens?" I asked raising my eyebrow.

"_Just the very adorable ones….HEY! GET THAT UGLY BITCH AWAY FROM THE BAR! Sorry I have to go." _

"Your mom?" I asked.

"_Of course…MOM, THE STRIPPERS ARE NOT FOR YOUR PERSONAL ENJOYMENT! Bye, my love._

"See you tomorrow Paulie."

I hung up the phone and turned to Miyagi.

"If you ever in your life do that to me again I'll cut your fingers off, got it?" I said. Miyagi nodded and Aikawa laughed.

"Scary…" Miyagi whispered.

Aikawa took me by the hand and dragged me upstairs. When I got to her door my phone ringed. It was a text message from Usagi. I ignored him.

My phone ringed again and this time it was someone calling me. I ignored that too.

I didn't know that he was in the hospital. I didn't know that my older brother was on the verge of death. Please, believe me…I didn't want any of this to happen. He asked me to let him die! What was I supposed to do? ….

* * *

><p>Wait, you said Usami?...Like, as in my Akihiko Usami.<p>

I'm mute, not deaf. What did you say?

So help me god...Wait...what...

No…No...No

You're lying.

Shut up. SHUT up. SHUT UP! SHUT UP!

Bullshit!

GET ME USAGI NOW! I WANT USAGI!

YOU'RE NOT SORRY! **I WANT HIM!**

Why would he do that?...Is he…Is he dead?

Well I'm **_fucking_** sorry that I'm writing fast! Is he dead? Is my Usagi dead?

Let me see the letter.** Give me the fucking letter!**

Oh god. Oh please, no. Oh please, _please, _no. Please. No! No! No!

But...I didn't! I didn't k-kill...

I didn't….

I didn't kill his father!


	5. Chapter 5

What does it matter anymore?

I said what I meant. What does this story even matter? Everything's turned to shit….He's dead! He's **fucking **dead! What does it matter anymore that I'm going to jail?

Stop crying? Y**ou want me to stop crying?** The man I've loved all my life is dead! He killed himself because of **_me_**! And you want me to fucking stop crying?

I didn't kill his father!

Go to hell! Take your shiny detective badge and shove it right up your-

…What? You can't do that!

You promised me you wouldn't arrest**_, him_**_. _

...fine.

FINE! I said fine. I'll continue. I'll fucking continue.

* * *

><p>Well the next day I don't remember much. I mean, the unimportant stuff. Like eating breakfast or making the bed. I just remember how packed the strip club was. It was filled with greasy fat men…there was only one guy I'd hook up with there. His name was Keichi and we always flirted. We had a thing when I was younger, 3 months before Usagi and I dated.<p>

Hm? Oh…yea…but I didn't charge Keichi for it. It was just, I'm horny and you're horny so let's get dirty. Anyways, I didn't love Keichi.

We had fun dancing together. He was a very close friend…he **is** a very close friend. Even to this day he is, he supports my decisions. I don't know why he does…nobody else contacts me anymore. They've given up all hope for me…but Keichi never did. He's the only one that believes I didn't kill Usagi's father.

Anyway, I was dancing on someone real rich. He was throwing hundreds in the air cuzz he had a lot of money. The song was We no speak English. All of a sudden, I'm being pulled away by Keichi. He whispered in my ear, 'let's give them something to be horny about'.

He pulled me onto the middle of the stage and we started dancing together. I felt his heat behind me and I was quite turned on.

Paulie let Usagi and everyone else into the club…he wanted to get me out of this life…that's why they were there.

No, I didn't. If I knew they were there I wouldn't be grinding against my ex.

So I'm grinding on Keichi and he grabs my thigh and I moan and press my head back into his shoulder. He took off my shirt and spun me around and I put my arms around him.

Yea, they were watching in this special booth. Usagi was sitting next to his brother and Hiroki (god knows how he even managed to get into the booth) was sitting next to Nowaki.

I'm grinding into Keichi and he moves his hand from my thigh to my hips. Then the lyrics, 'AMERICANO' was sung and he grabbed my face and we came close to kissing. I was going to let him too…

Yes, of course I loved…love…Usagi. But I was done…done trying to please him and the world. I just wanted to live. Needless to say, Usagi stormed on stage and practically threw me off of him. I stumbled into the booth and onto Haruhiko's lap.

"Eh? Sorry!" I said. His pants were wrinkled and when I looked up his face was stained with tear streaks. I knew something was wrong right away. Usagi punched Keichi in the face and the bouncers were about to brutally hurt him but I yelled for them to stop. I climbed back onto the stage and nursed Keichi's head in my lap.

"Somebody get Paule," They all just staired at Keichi's bloody face, "GET HIM NOW!"

They all started running, like ants, away from me.

Keichi moaned. "Misakiiiii!" He wined, "Your boyfriend is so mean! Why is he so mean?"

I deadpanned. "Because you tried to kiss me, Keichi."

"But you wanted it!" He wined again. I sighed.

"I didn't want it. I just went with the flow." Keichi laughed. "And the flow was hot and steamy like always, Misaki." He said.

"Keichi..." I said hesitantly.

Usagi growled.

…Why would you ask that? OH! Are you gay?

You sure?

Okay, okay! I was just asking…sheesh. Sex with Keichi was brilliant! It was extrodinary!

Who asks that? …Are you sure you're straight?

You have a wife? Really? What's her name?

…Tea? Really? That's her name?

…Hey, Mr. Winchester…

No not you, Sam.

Okay, Mr. Dean? Same last name…Oh you guys are brothers.

MMM…is he gay? Sam I mean.

...I knew it. Soooo who're you dating?

….. -_-

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!

Oh you're serious…

Um...well…this is akward.

So should I leave out all the kinky details?

Well I mean, he's your boyfriend now.

Okay then…you'll regret it.

So Usagi growled. He went to go after Keichi again but I pushed him back. "Damnit, Usami! Just stay back, okay?"

He looked hurt. Probably because I used his family name. I never did that unless I was really angry.

"Who the hell hurt him?" Paulie yelled at one of the bouncers. The bouncer, scared shitless of Paulie, pointed to Usagi. Now Paulie is the gayest man you'll ever meet in your life but when he gets scary he's fucking scary. He looked at Usagi-san with eyes of death. The only one brave enough to stand up to Paulie was me but even then I was afraid too.

"This is my boyfriend, Paulie. The one I was telling you about." I spoke in a whisper. And it wasn't cuzz I was too afraid of Paulie to talk, I was too ashamed that Hiroki and everyone else saw me dance like that.

"The one that rode you for hours and hours without stopping?" He asked. I blushed hard.

Keichi started laughing. "No, No Paulie. That was me!"

I punched Keichi and blood started coming from his nose. "Hey man! Come on, don't mess up my beautiful face!"

Rolling my eyes I brushed the hair out of his eyes. "Keichi go home. Please."

"Kay, my beautiful maid." I blushed. "ONE TIME!" I screamed out loud.

I'd cosplayed for him when I had gotten wasted. Not my finest day. After I cosplayed we had hours apon hours of kinky hot sex. I tell you the man has a very big d-

…I'm sorry…so inappropriate.

"Misaki…I didn't know you'd replaced me…" Usagi said. His eyes filled with grief and those lavender pupils drew me into his elegant facial feature.

Because I was with the man for 6 years, he taught me how to write really nicely.

"I-I…" I couldn't say anything. I knew it was over for us. I wanted to die, I really did.

Keichi spoke up for me, "Hey, hey. I'm just the flirty 18 year old. No harm in me playing with sunshine over here."

"Sunshine?" Usagi spoke with venom.

"Because I need coffee to keep me awake and energized every time we-" I covered Keichi's mouth with my hand and shook my head furiously.

"You idiot! Stop talking, now." Keichi removed my hands from his mouth and put my hands on his face.

He snuggled into my hand and I sighed.

"Misakii~ can I taste your pretty boyfriend pwease?" He asked in the sweetest voice.

"I'm going to kill you." I said very monotonously.

"We all know Misaki won't kill anyone! And plus, you love me too much." Keichi hugged my neck.

"I'm seriously considering killing you." I said with no remorse. I seriously was 5 seconds from shooting him in the skull.

Keichi decided that I was serious and he quickly let go of me while Usagi-san pulled me away from him. He pulled me away and out the club- I was confused, I was. Everyone looked so gloomy so I could only assume it was about me and my stripping.

"Don't even say anything about it." I said. Akihiko scoffed and harshly said, "This isn't about you cheating on me."

An unspoken _whore_ passed through his eyes. It stung.

"Whatever. Look, do you want something? You're interrupting my business." Usagi-san growled and punched the wall. Hiroki, Nowaki, and Haruhiko all stormed out of the club and into the alley way where Usagi-san and I were.

I'm assuming Shinobu had found Miyagi somewhere in that measley club.

Because he wasn't there with them.

Anyway, they came all together stumbling out of the door.

"Inturrupting your business?" He punched the wall again; blood smeared the brick tiles.

"Stop being such a baby. You didn't think I cared for you did I?" I asked. Usagi-san looked away and clentched his teeth. "It was a game. It's all a game."

"…I hate you." Usagi-san said, his voice held no remorse for me.

What did I feel? I felt like I was going to die. Like the wind had been sucked from me.

Hey, Detectives?

Do you know what it's like to always feel sad? To always feel like there's something wrong with you? And when you finally found someone to make you feel normal…to make you feel right…it goes wrong?

Yes. It's what I felt.

You know, I had dreams about killing myself. Just one day jumping off a bridge. Leaving everyone behind. Finally, being at peace with what I've lost.

Why I never did? Well that's easy to answer…I didn't want to leave him. I didn't want to leave Usagi. He was my rock. He was everything I had.

HA! My brothers were only there when they wanted to be. Hiroki was too in love with Nowaki to see I was practically starving myself.

Takahiro? Takahiro was too dead to care. It was only when I was sobbing…when I was begging for him to listen that he cared. For god sakes, I smelt like sex all the time.

How does no one smell it?

Smell the sin! I wanted so much to die but I wanted so much to live. To really live! No more surgeries, no more whoring, no more stripping, no more nothing!

I wanted to get married to Usagi-san…but he's dead now. He's dead.

Forget it. It's useless.

Just take me to prison. Let them kill me there. This is useless.

FUCK HIROKI! DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND WHAT I'M TELLING YOU?

I'M TELLING YOU THAT I CAN **NOT** LIVE WITHOUT AKIHIKO!

I…I'm sorry…I just want it to be over.

Everything.

Yes.

Yes.

Yes…even my life.

Yes…I want my life to be over. I beg for it to be over.

You can't help me. But thank you for trying.

I will.

So, Usagi said he hated me. It took me a few minuets to recover…but I did.

"Oh you hate me? Or is that because you know why I'm so good at pleasing you." I said. It took me a few seconds to realize that Usagi-san had just punched me. I had blood coming from my nose.

"Akihiko!"

"Usami!" Haruhiko and Nowaki said at the same time. Haruhiko said, "I know your mad but you never hit other people!" which was followed with Hiroki shouting, "Especially not my brother you scum bag!"

I shrugged. It didn't really hurt. "Whatever. You could probably punch better, but now that my face is messed up I can't go back in there."

Usagi-san went to punch me again but Haruhiko held him back. "I hate you." He repeated.

I smiled sadly, "Me too." And I did hate myself too.

"Misaki…we came because of Takahiro." Nowaki said kindly. I sighed. "If he wants me to go back tell him no…actually tell him I said he can-"

"He's in the hospital." Hiroki broke in. My heart stopped. It was the scariest moment in my life. It never occurred to me that Takahiro could die. I mean, yea I thought about it…but it never hit me.

Until that moment.

Until he first went to the hospital.

I didn't know what to say. "What?"

"After you left Takahiro passed out…he's on a respirator. Doctor says he doesn't have much time left without a proper donor for him. We wanted to tell you…" Nowaki said. He was clutching Hiroki's hand. Haruhiko was hugging his brother.

No one was near me.

"So what does that mean?" I wouldn't falter. I wouldn't show them I was weak.

"Takahiro is dying Misaki." Hiroki piped up. He wiped his tears and snot on a napkin he pulled from his pocket.

My mind went blank until I finally registered what Hiroki was saying. I screamed and hollered for Keichi. I needed support right now. I needed someone to hold me.

Hiroki was with Nowaki.

Usagi punched me. Do you really think I thought he'd hold me until I stopped crying?

Haruhiko was calming down Usagi-san.

Anyways, I hollered and Keichi came running out of the club. The music had stopped because practically everyone had left when Usagi punched Keichi.

"What? What happened?" It was the first time I've seen him that serious.

"Keichi…oh god…" I buried my face into his chest. "My brothers in the hospital. I can't…I can't pay!" I suddenly realized. "I can't pay and they're going to kick him out…Usami take me to Aikawa's house."

Haruhiko raised his eyebrow, "I don't know where-"

"Not you moron." I said, "Usami, take me to Aikawa's house."

"Why would-"

Keichi pulled out a-

Wait…if I tell you I don't want Keichi to get in trouble too.

He won't? You sure? If he gets in trouble because of this-

…I trust you.

Well he pulled out a gun and aimed it at Usagi. "Now listen sweetheart. We've no time for your silly bullshit."

"Jesus Crist Keichi. Don't point it as his dick!" I said. Keichi didn't move. Usagi paled, "Oh my god there's a gun pointed at my dick!"

"Would you rather have it pointed at your face?" Nowaki said afraid to move. "I know this makes no sense…but yes I'd rather have the gun pointed at my face." Usag-san took a deep breath in.

So Keichi aimed it to his face. "

"Better?" Keichi said. Usagi's face had turned pale. Hiroki was looking at me wide eyed and Nowaki was holding Hiroki protectively. Haruhiko was the only one who looked like he didn't care.

"…No…not really." I admitted, "Listen Keichi. You know where Aikawa lives?"

Keichi shook his head. I looked to Usagi who looked in no shape to drive. So I ran back into the club and screamed out, "I WILL HAVE SEX WITH YOU IF YOU PAY ME 24 GRAND!"

No one moved. I mean, I have a sexy body but still…24 grand. That's still a lot of money…especially for the very few people who were still in the club.

"I'll pay you 2 grand…" One man admitted. I couldn't see his face at the time…but if I knew…If I knew it was that bastard I'd never have done it with him.

Why? Because then he wouldn't take extreme measures to "be with me".

Yes. He was there on purpose. That rich bastarad.

Then Keichi ran in and said, "WE'LL HAVE SEX TOGETHER AND LET YOU WATCH…"

The same man sat up and said, "5 grand."

I looked outside where Haruhiko was restraining Usagi from beating the shit out of everyone.

"How much was the bill again?" I asked in the calmest voice I could muster up.

Hiroki studdered. It was Nowaki who finally said something. "I'm not going to tell you if you're going to keep doing this."

"B-B-But Takahiro!" Hiroki cried out. It was obvious he was torn between which brother to save.

Haruhiko was the next to talk, "The bill was 20,000 dollars and it's needed in 2 weeks otherwise they'll kick him out."

Usagi gasped, "TRAITOR!" he said. Nowaki looked back angrily at Haruhiko as did Hiroki.

"Thank you." I said sincerely.

"Keichi," I poked him, "We need 20 grand."

Keichi gasped and whispered, "That's a lot Misaki…"

I nodded. "Alright. Here's the deal. I'll let you leave marks on me."

The man smiled, "10 grand!"

"And we could use toys and bondage stuff."

"12 grand!"

"And…" I hesitated. What I was about to say…it was very much frowned on in the world I live in. It was dangerous. But I needed the money. "And I'll let you do it without a condom."

"17 GRAND!" He yelled becoming excited. Keichi gasped and grabbed my shoulders.

"And I'll stay with you for 3 days doing whatever you want. Whenever you want. However you want, and with whomever you want."

The man stood up and screamed, "SOLD FOR 20 GRAND!"

I scoffed. He said, "So…where do you want to do this?"

"It'll start tomorrow. First you pay me."

And he did pay me. It took a few hours for him to actually trust me. But he paid me. And so I went with Usagi and Keich to the hospital.

Not once did I cry.


End file.
